♥ My happy ENDING ? ? ?

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I know that nobody's perfect, but this won't stop me from hoping that someday, someone who's perfect for me will come. He will be a faithful , sweet and funny boyfriend. He will have his patience to me and accept me for who I am. We will be good together and for each other. 


Someday, I will fall in love with the right person, at the right time, and for all the right reasons. And when that happens, I will not get so caught up in him that I will forget the little things I love about myself like a romantic and a sweet girl. (haha) He will help me achieve my little goals everyday, and even support me in pursuing my grandest, craziest dream: to be a successful NURSE :)


I may not run into the person I deserve anytime soon, but that's okay; I have my whole life ahead of me. I'm not in a hurry. I know that right guy is out there, and he is also looking for me. And when we do find each other, it will be real and wonderful life i will have. And I will know for sure that the long wait-and maybe even the heartbreaks that came with it-was totally worth it. :) 

happy mother's day mama

happy mother's day mama

My mom died of ovary cancer 9 years ago, when I was nine yrs old. I find lately that I am still grieving for her, especially as this is Mother's Day weekend. I grieved her death when it happened, but I think it was in some indirect way that had to do with childhood defense mechanisms. I am trying to understand why, after all this time, I am finally grieving for her fully. Maybe it's just that the pain is not as acute as it was during those first few years. 


There are times when I long to hear ur voice,& feel ur arms around me.U're my guardian angel. I LOVE YOU MAMA AND WISH U WERE STILL HERE ♥ HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!

Soulmate?

Soulmates, soulmates, soulmates! Soulmates?????

What are soulmates? Do they exist?haha

I believe in soulmates the same way I believe in flowers and chocolate. hmm.. They may seem cliché or we can say exaggeration, but they exist and they make our lives better.

Now, to begin, I also believe in fate and karma (call me idealistic, everyone does) haha. I believe that everything happens for a reason,even if the reason is not evident or obvious to us at first glance. In terms of karma, what goes around definitely comes around.. :))

My dad often scolds me on my undying faith in the concept of karma. hahaha He always says, “yen, if you only do good things because you don’t want karma to come around and work against you, that isn't true karma. You’re only being good so it will come back to you.” He thinks the idea of karma is hypocritical haiszt!..  and I will admit, that based on his logic... it implies that people’s good actions are not unselfish concern at all because they seem to be doing good deeds with the expectation that the good karma will come back to them. But I don’t agree with that. I think that over your lifespan, if you do good things and genuinely have a good heart, karma will reward you somehow?? Kinda like.. there is no such thing as luck..  luck is preparation meeting opportunity! hehe 

Anyways,  I do believe in soulmates.  I think your soulmate is someone who completes you, who brings out the best in you, and who you are most comfortable with. That at the end of you life, you can trun around and say that you were most at ease with that person who understood you the best and with whom you bonded with most. Even if you don’t end up with that person or the relationship fails, that does not mean that it wasn’t worth something, that it didn’t teach you about yourself, or that it hasn’t made you who you are?... : )


Based on this definition of soulmates, if you’ve read carefully, you'll notice that I don’t actually think that your soulmate has to necessarily be someone that you are romanticailly involved with. Instead, they can be a parent, a mentor, a sibling…..a best friend. The person in your life who you truly connect with. well.. obviously our soulmates for short is just our "FAMILY OR FRIENDS".. :) for me, soul mate is not the only one that really lookin for ...but it is for the love and care that you feel from them (family,friends) everyday! :)

and she messed my LOVE ♥

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KukTVfzEWik

            If there were two people on earth that would not want to see you hurt, there would  be your sweet friend and your loving boyfriend. At least that was what you used to believe. But now your world is turned upside down when the very same two people are the ones who cause you so much pain. The pain  from your most trusted individuals!


I was with a guy for more than 3 years,he is my First love.. we're together since High School and at the time thought he was my everything. I had a tight relationship with his family and we were always together. .so to make the Long story short - he and my close friend are together now. ..they hide their relationship to everyone for 1 month..and i was really hurt cos during that month, my only friend that knows everything about my status with my boyfriend was her! and there i sensed that her support for us was not there anymore i mean saying to me that "things don’t work out anymore and i think it's much better if you would break up with him".. wow! i was shocked when i heard that from her.. :(

In the beginning I blamed myself for what happened. Like what if I didn't always have them around each other. The truth of the matter is - you never know why people do messed up things. The only thing you can do is learn from it and move on. I obviously left the relationship and never looked back. but for the family of my ex, we're still communicating. i really2 love them so much.they treated me like i'm part of the family.i treated his mom as my real mom..his father as my real father... his sister as my real sister and his cousins,uncles and aunts as well.. and until now, i still have them in my dreams!... and even though i have my own life someday..my love and care for them will never fade...i thank them cos if my ex and i have a little fight before they're always on my side.... i thank them for giving me all the support and love for the relationship that I had with my ex.

I've been put in a stressful situation!.I don't know what to do first, am i right if I'll just mind my feelings first or  mind the feelings of my friend....... It is also hard to do this all because so much time was invested in the relationship but I'm so much happier now. I need to realize and remember that I'm a good person and I deserve to be treated that way. I refuse to stay with someone who isn't worthy of my love. No guy is worth your self dignity. And like my friends said - if you're ever in this situation - she did you the biggest favor of all!

and for my friend.. i hope that someday.. somehow she'll realize all..all the pain that i have felt  because of her!all the trust and love for a friend i gave her but still she was so selfish...i don't think for any revenge or something that can destroy their relationship because i du wanna let her feel this heartache like i feel right now..... ..yes! i lost him and I lost my friend but still life must go on..  That girl is obviously not my real friend and that guy is obviously not the love of my life. As hurt as it may be, it is far better to discover that now rather than soon. so i take this as a blessing too.


well,  i think  my song for my friend is DON'T MESS WITH MY LOVE by m2m.. my classmates and friends knw this already hahaha! just check this out if u want to listen. :))

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KukTVfzEWik

"DON'T MESS WITH MY LOVE"

I thought you were a friend of mine but I was wrong
You tried to fit into the arms where I belong
You moved right in behind my back
Everyone knows friends don't do that

I thought you were somebody I could trust
You always said you were happy for us
How could you go and break my heart?
When you knew all along he was mine from the start

He is everything to me
And you know we're meant to be
He's my baby
Don't mess with my love
Take everything I own
Ooh just leave that boy alone
He's my baby
Don't mess with my
Mess with my love
Don't mess with my love

You came right over and looked in my eyes
You said the stories were rumors and lies
And I wish I could believe in you
But I'm sorry to say he told me the truth
  

Friends don't do what you do
There's no excuse
I'm so confused
I thought you cared about me
But now I see
All you care about is you 

.. hahahaha ble!

so this is my first blog! haha

              This is me!           ♥  K r i s t e l   J a v i e r  E n e r l a n  ♥

This is my first BLOG entry ( October 21, 2010) . My friends, specially my best friend  have asked me for years why I dont start one.well Frankly..  I don't have the time.haha.. but  now I realize that there is so much information that I come across that is truly useful and I dont always have time to write an article... so since it is our sem break no duties, no studies no lectures, no assignments no projects and all!! :))  i'll start loving this.. So much to say, so much to share, and so much to spend my feelings.. this can deserve as my journal.. haha! 

Thanks for reading and I hope all of my time and effort helps or at least entertains you on many levels.

it's enough for now. I’ll try to do this once a week or so. : p